Why Do We Cry? The Science Behind Our Tears

Have you ever felt moved to tears by a poignant movie scene, a touching reunion, or a particularly frustrating day? You’re not alone. Humans are the only species that sheds tears in response to emotional states. According to Harvard Health Publishing, the average American woman cries 3.5 times monthly, while the average man cries 1.9 times.

Facts about crying reveal that it is a universal experience yet distinctly human. The reason behind this lies in the complex physiological and psychological factors that contribute to our tears.

Crying is a complex emotional and physiological response. Different types of tears, each composed of unique substances, can cause crying. Various triggers can also cause crying, which offers several physical, mental, and social benefits. However, excessive crying can sometimes signal an underlying issue that needs attention.

Understanding the science behind crying helps us recognize its value while staying mindful of when it might indicate a deeper concern.

The Three Types of Tears

Crying is a natural response triggered by a range of emotions, physical irritants, or even hormonal changes. So, how does crying work? There are three distinct types of tears, each with its own unique purpose:

1. Basal Tears

Basal tears are the unsung heroes of eye health. These everyday tears are constantly at work, lubricating and nourishing your eyes. Think of them like microscopic movers, spreading nutrients and flushing away debris with every blink.

Basal tears are made up of the following:

• Water, for moisture 
• Mucus, to spread the tears evenly across the eye’s surface
• Oils, to prevent evaporation
• Antibodies and proteins to combat infection

So while you might barely notice them, basal tears play a vital role in keeping your eyes functioning and healthy.

2. Reflex Tears

Reflex tears are the first responders when something foreign gets in your eye, such as dust, dirt, or even onion vapors. They gush out in large volumes to flush away the irritant and protect your eye.

Do you know that stinging sensation that comes from chopping onions? The chemical called syn-propanethial-S-oxide reacts with your reflex tears to create a burning feeling and trigger your eyes to water excessively. So, while uncomfortable, reflex tears are actually your eyes’ way of defending themselves.

3. Emotional Tears

Uniquely human, emotional tears are triggered by strong feelings rather than physical causes. While basal and reflex tears keep your eyes healthy, emotional tears seem to serve a more social purpose.

Researchers have found some interesting differences in the composition of emotional tears:

• They contain higher levels of stress hormones than basal tears.
• They have more protein, which makes them thicker and more viscous.
• In some studies, they also contained additional minerals and toxins.

This unique chemical makeup has led some experts to theorize that crying may serve to “flush out” stress hormones and emotional toxins—though more research is needed to say definitively.

Perhaps more importantly, the act of shedding emotional tears sends a powerful signal to others that we are experiencing intense feelings and may need support.

Why Do We Cry: Five Common Reasons

Now that we know the science behind tears let’s explore some of the most common reasons humans cry. While the triggers can vary from person to person, here are five near-universal causes of crying:

1. Sadness and Grief

Perhaps the most well-known reason for emotional crying is sadness, particularly when it comes to loss and grief. Losing a loved one, whether a family member, friend, or beloved pet, is one of the most emotionally painful experiences we can go through. Emotional crying during times of mourning is a natural way to express our anguish and gradually release those pent-up emotions.

Sadness can also arise from more everyday experiences, like watching a heartbreaking movie, reading a tragic news story, or simply feeling lonely. Letting ourselves cry when we feel sad can actually be quite cathartic.

2. Stress and Overwhelm

Life’s pressures can build up until they feel overwhelming, and crying is a natural response to that stress. A demanding job, caring for an ailing parent, relationship troubles—any number of stressors can push us to a breaking point.

Over time, chronic stress increases levels of cortisol and adrenaline. Shedding tears is your body’s way of releasing that tension and restoring a sense of balance. Sometimes, a good cry when you’re at your wit’s end is precisely what you need to gain a clearer perspective.

3. Physical Pain 

Tears may start to flow when we experience physical pain, whether from an injury, illness, or medical procedure. When we cry, our bodies release natural painkillers called endorphins, which can provide some relief.

Interestingly, emotional and physical pain invoke the same regions of the brain. So whether you’re shedding tears over a broken heart or a broken bone, crying is a way your body copes with emotional distress.

4. Extreme Joy and Beauty

Not all tears are born from sorrow—sometimes, crying can accompany profound feelings of happiness, gratitude, or awe. Maybe you teared up at your child’s wedding, during a breathtaking sunset, or while witnessing an act of remarkable kindness.

These “tears of joy” arise when we’re deeply moved and a bit overcome by our positive emotions. Allowing yourself to well up at life’s most beautiful moments is a sign of a big, open heart.

5. Empathy and Compassion

Our capacity to shed tears in response to others’ pain is a powerful expression of empathy. Crying with someone who is hurting—a practice known as “co-crying”—creates a deep sense of connection and shows them they’re not alone.

Humans are social creatures wired for compassion. Seeing someone else in distress enhances emotion-sharing empathy and the same regions in our brains as if we were experiencing that anguish ourselves. So when you tear up hearing a friend recount their hardships, take heart—it’s a sign of your humanity and a caring spirit.

The Surprising Benefits of Crying

Is crying good for you? While crying is often seen as a sign of weakness or something to be ashamed of, shedding tears actually comes with a host of benefits for your mind, body, and social connections. Here are some of the science-backed ways crying can be good for you:

Physical Perks 

Studies have shown that crying can:

• Release toxins and stress hormones, providing a cathartic cleanse.
• Activate the parasympathetic nervous system, which helps you relax.
• Increase the production of endorphins, your body’s natural pain reliever.
• Improve vision by lubricating the eyes and flushing out irritants.

So, while it may feel physically draining, crying can lead to a sense of calm and well-being afterward. It’s like a pressure valve releasing pent-up tension.

Emotional Release

Crying doesn’t just provide a physical release—it’s also a powerful emotional outlet. Bottling up intense feelings can lead to both physical and mental health problems over time. Emotional crying allows you to acknowledge and express your emotions in a healthy way.

Research has found that 85% of women and 73% of men feel less angry or sad after crying. Shedding tears can lift your mood, provide a sense of closure, and even help you sleep better. It’s a natural coping mechanism that allows you to process difficult feelings and move forward.

Social Bonding 

While many of us feel self-conscious about crying in front of others, shedding tears can create deeper social bonds. Crying is an authentic expression of emotion that shows others you’re genuine and relatable.

In fact, crying openly can make others perceive you as more trustworthy. It signals that you’re vulnerable and willing to connect. Tears can soften anger, elicit compassion, and bridge divides between people. 

So the next time you feel tears welling up with your loved ones around, remember—crying together can be a profound opportunity for connection and healing.

Is Your Crying Excessive? When to Seek Help

We all go through periods when we cry more easily or frequently. But how much crying is “normal”?

Experts say that crying more than usual may signal you’re overwhelmed by stressful situations or unresolved grief. Other times, frequent crying can signal an underlying mental health issue, like depression or anxiety.

Here are some signs that your crying may be excessive or problematic:

• You cry nearly every day over small issues.
• Crying starts to interfere with your daily activities or relationships.
• You feel emotionally drained or “empty” much of the time.
• You have other symptoms like persistent sadness, irritability, or hopelessness.

If your crying feels out of control or you’re concerned about how much you’re crying, don’t hesitate to seek help. Talking to a therapist can provide invaluable support and help you develop coping strategies.

In some cases, crying spells may be a symptom of a neurological condition called pseudobulbar affect (PBA). PBA is characterized by sudden, uncontrollable crying or laughing that doesn’t match how you feel. If you experience this, it’s important to speak with your doctor.

Remember, seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness. You don’t have to carry the emotional burden alone.

Coping with Crying

Whether you’re shedding tears yourself or supporting a crying loved one, here are some tips to help you navigate those tearful moments:  

When You’re the One Crying

• Acknowledge your feelings without judgment. Remember crying is natural and healthy.  
• Find a private place to let it out if you’re uncomfortable crying in public.
• Take some slow, deep breaths to calm your body and emotions.
• Use positive self-talk, like “It’s okay to cry” or “Letting it out will help me feel better.”
• Do some soothing behaviors afterward, like sipping tea, listening to calming music, or taking a warm bath.

When Someone Else is Crying

• Resist the urge to tell them not to cry or cheer them up right away. Let them express their emotions without judgment.
• Use supportive phrases like “I’m here for you” or “It’s okay to let it out.”
• Offer physical comfort if appropriate, like a hug, hand squeeze, or tissue.
• Avoid minimizing their feelings with phrases like “It’s not that bad.”
• Ask how you can support them, and just be present with your full attention.

Above all, try not to suppress your tears or apologize for them. Crying is not just normal—it’s necessary. Let yourself cry when you need to, and be gentle with yourself and others in the process.

Embrace Your Tears: Crying is a Sign of Strength

So the next time you find yourself tearing up, remember—you’re experiencing a deeply human and healthy response to life’s ups and downs. Crying is a testament to your resilience and capacity to feel deeply.

In a world that often tells us to buck up and put on a brave face, shedding tears openly is a radical act of emotional honesty. It takes courage to be vulnerable and authentic.

As author Washington Irving once said, “There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues.”

So embrace your tears and the message they send to yourself and others. You’re strong enough to handle big feelings and wise enough to let yourself feel them fully. That is something to be celebrated, not stifled.

Keep on crying when you need to. It’s one of the most profoundly human experiences—a natural and necessary part of this beautiful, messy journey we call life.